The Letter Someone Didn't Want you to See

For my 100th post (!) I'm going to share with you a letter that someone else didn't want you to see.

Intrigued?  So was I, when Google Alerts notified me of this book review, recently posted on YouTube.   Woohoo!  I thought to myself.  A video review of Maybe Never, Maybe Now!

I clicked on the link...the video loaded, and then, (before even watching the review) I saw the following comments from the reviewer:

"Heres my opinion on a terrible book.

Things I forgot to add in this video:

-Most unoriginal names ever. Tyler, Caitlyn, Conner? Wow. We're just missing Alex and Julie.

- It was really annoying when she explained what the french meant because I already understood what it meant. Its not that bad if you don't understand what une baguette is but if you're bilingual like me, do yourself a favor and don't read it.

...ALSO on Amazon.com it said this book was for: (ages 13 and up) ... it doesn't seam that way AT ALL"

OUCH!

I'm sorry she didn't like the book, but obviously, that sometimes happens.  The reviewer goes on to describe everything she hates, and then, she tempts me by saying "sorry if you're the author and you're watching this".

So yes, I replied, asking her to be fair and post my comments along with hers.  She didn't post my response, which is her prerogative, but since she is using a public forum to question me, I am using this public forum to address those questions.

And so, my reply:

"Hey there!  I’m sorry I don’t know your name.  Surprise! I AM the author of Maybe Never, Maybe Now, and there are no apologies necessary for your very honest review:  nobody likes everything, and I was well aware of that fact when I “put myself out there” with a publisher.  I do hope, however, that you’ll grant me the courtesy of reading (and posting) my response as I’d like to address some of your comments.

If you are in grade 11, you are much older than the target audience of 13+, so I am not surprised that you found the book too short and lacking in detailed description.  As you mentioned in your review, Maybe Never, Maybe Now is actually the sequel to Painting Caitlyn, so was written in the same spare style.  The quick pace and deliberate lack of extraneous description helped all of my books win numerous awards, and Painting Caitlyn’s appeared on the American Library Association’s prestigious “YALSA Quick Picks” list for Reluctant Readers in 2007 along with New Moon and a number of other more well known works by authors with whom I am truly honoured to be associated. 

“Popularity” in books is actually harder to assess than you may realize.  Did you know that publishers actually have to PURCHASE the front page space on websites such as Amazon, and the good display tables in bookstores?  The bigger the publisher, the more they can spend convincing you to buy their books, so a whole table of one author doesn’t necessarily mean that the books are amazing, but it probably means the publisher has lots of money – and they may also have a larger budget for producing so-so books.  Smaller publishers actually have to be much more careful with what they publish, and will often turn out great stuff that’s critically acclaimed, but harder to find, because bookstores might only carry one or two copies on the shelves, with the spines turned outwards instead of the covers.  (Note that I’m not claiming to be great [though all of my books have been critically acclaimed by major reviewers] I am simply pointing out the irrelevance of describing a book as “popular” or “not very popular”.)

Character names, obviously, are always a matter of personal preference.  I addressed the name issue both on my website http://www.kimberlyjoypeters.com/index_files/Page1030.htm (ie. how I chose the names) and in my blog (ie why I hate strange character names) http://kimberlyjoypeters.blogspot.com/search?q=names, so take a peek at both articles if you’re interested.

By day, I am a teacher of both French and English.  The French teacher in me LOVES that you are bilingual, and apologizes for annoying you with translation, but hopes that you can recognize how unique and special your bilingualism makes you: translations were absolutely necessary for most readers.

The English teacher in me worries that you identified only the literal journey of going on an exchange to Quebec, and completely missed the figurative journey of learning to trust yourself again after you’ve been mistreated by someone you believed in.  I know I did my job as an author and managed to make that message accessible to readers because School Library Journal recognized that the story “is about the emotional journey of healing and forgiveness…”

The reader in me knows that nobody enjoys everything they read.  I HATED The Great Gatsby in high school for one of the same reasons you hated Maybe Never, Maybe Now:  I couldn’t understand why the guy kept mooning over Daisy and didn’t just get on with his life.  The thing was, at the time I read it, I’d never actually been in love, so I couldn’t identify with the characters or make any personal connections to the story.  But guess what?  When I had to re-read it, three years later in university after a devastating break-up, I felt Gatsby’s pain.  I understood Daisy’s flirtations.  I got it!  And I loved it. 

I receive lots of emails and letters from girls and women all over North America who identify with Caitlyn and her experiences.  Many of them make me cry as they describe their own history of abusive relationships, and the lasting scars that result.  So you know what?  The woman in me is actually HAPPY that you did not relate to this character.  I wish you continued joy and success in life, and in romance."

The End of the Innocence

(With apologies to Don Henley for stealing his song title to label this post)

When did you lose your innocence?  No, not that kind of innocence.  The kind where the magic of Christmas is so strong - so unquestionably permanent in your schema - that you can't imagine it ever going away?

I lost mine at sixteen.  I woke up early on Christmas morning and felt the usual thrill of holiday excitement that normally would have propelled me out of bed in the dark to see what Santa had left me.  Only, that year, I glanced at the clock.  And something shifted.  I realized, in an instant, that if the gifts were already down there, they'd still be there in another hour.  Or two.  And then I did what up until that moment in my life would have been unthinkable:  I rolled over, and went back to sleep on Christmas morning.

I've always described that morning as the day I "grew up".  I actually thought it was sort of cool that I could pinpoint one specific moment in my emotional development that signified maturity and self-control.

But it wasn't until the other night, on a different Christmas Eve, that I realized the truth: my father had died ten months before that morning, and that was the first Christmas without him.

My decision to stay in bed probably didn't have anything to do with facing reality:  it was actually all about avoiding it.

It seems obvious, as I type this, but it took me twenty-six years to make that connection.  So maybe I really did hold on to my innocence a lot longer than I've always believed.

Or maybe now, at least, I know where it went.

Finally! The Secret of the Sisterhood!

I'm a big fan of Ann Brashares' The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants series.  I didn't think I would be, as the premise of four girls sharing one pair of jeans seemed a little bizarre to me, but once I picked up the series, I grew to love the characters. 

I did get over the idea of them sharing the pants, but I always wondered about their "you must never wash the pants" rule.  Even in the movie version, this rule was addressed with an "EWWW".  Today, Yahoo has provided me with their secret.  I share it with you now:

"Denim retailers from Levi's to Gap want you to stop washing your jeans after every wear. Ultimately, the more you wash, the more water you waste and the more your denim will fade. To benefit the planet and your wallet, freeze your jeans instead. By slipping your pants into a plastic bag and tossing them in the freezer for a night or two, you can kill odour causing bacteria, preserve your worn-in fit, and maintain the colour so that they'll look brand new way longer. Plus, you will end up doing laundry less frequently. Time for a bigger freezer."

From: http://ca.shine.yahoo.com/quick-tip-freeze-jeans-190000285.html

November is National Novel Writing Month!

...and while I don't expect any of us with "day jobs" will end up with final, polish works, the challenge of writing a set number of words every day could be just the motivator we need to hammer out a draft.  I thought about my first novel, Painting Caitlyn, for years.  But thinking didn't get it written.  The Random House contest for a first Young Adult novel did inspire me to write, because I had a set deadline.  I didn't win, but I ended up with a solid draft that only needed a bit of editing before Lobster Press picked it up. After that, I've written to contact deadlines (eg.  I submit an outline of what I think will happen in a book, sign the contract, and THEN write it.)  There's nothing like a little external pressure

And so, write away - after all, it's National Novel Writing Month!

Rick's Rant/Reasons to Read

The media were abuzz today with the most recent "rant" by Canadian Comedian/Political Commentator Rick Mercer's latest "rant" about bullying and teen suicide.   The specific case he referenced involved a teen who was depressed,  was bullied for being gay, and ultimately took his own life.

In the video, Mercer noted that it's not enough to tell kids that "it will get better", because teens need role models.

I agree.  And although I don't think there's any substitute for real, live role models, I think this is another example of a case where thoughtful, well-written young adult literature can be a powerful tool in making kids feel less lonely.  I often receive email from readers who say my novels make a difference in their lives, because readers see themselves in the characters.

And I'll say it again here now:  books had a huge impact on me, and on my own struggles during adolescence. 

Mercer challenged adults to step up as role models, saying : 

“If you’re gay and yu’re in public life, I’m sorry, you don’t have to run around with a Pride flag and bore the hell out of everyone, but you can’t be invisible. Not anymore. 300 kids is 300 too many,”

I'm not gay, so I can't be a role model from that perspective.

But as an author, I am out there in "public life".  And I have suffered from depression off and on throughout my childhood and adult years, and as an author who has struggled with depression, I'm standing up now and saying "Let me be your role model, because it DOES get better."  

I'm always trying to balance my author's persona with my teacher's persona, and in a small, small town, maybe I'm taking a big risk here by admitting to my struggles wtih depression.  But nobody judges me harshly when I tell them I survived Thyroid Cancer at age twenty-nine, so maybe if more parents and kids can see me thriving post cancer AND post depression, they will come to understood that depression -- like cancer -- is a treatable medical condition.  And maybe if I tell them that there are a lot of amazing books out there about kids just like them, they won't feel so alone.   And maybe by sharing my history I will help one person.  And that will be worth it.

If you think you might be depressed, know that IT'S NOT A WEAKNESS, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT, and IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT MAKING YOURSELF CHEER UP.  Talk to someone you trust, or visit http://www.kidshelpphone.ca/teens/home/splash.aspx

Greg Loves Annie

One of the things people always ask me about writing is this:  "Where do you get your ideas?". 

All around me.

Not everything I see or do or hear about is going to end up being a part of my writing projects.  But lots of those things will trigger ideas that turn into something else.

Last summer, I became obsessed with Greg and Annie.

I don't know Greg and Annie they really are, but one of them began declaring their affections through grafitti.  The graffiti was VERY noticeable, because I live in a small, scenic town with far more retirees than grafitti artists - or vandals, depending on your point of view.

I missed a few at the beginning (like the one on the railway crossing sign), but over the year that they appeared, I took pictures of quite a few of these "declarations".  And in my mind, I began creating personalities for Greg and Annie.  Physical descriptions.  Background stories.  I won't describe my own imaginings, but will share the photos here, so that you, too, might write their story in your own mind.

Think Deeply!

Yesterday I blogged about the subjectivity of reading.  I'm still thinking about it.

Maybe part of that reflection had to do with the fact that I spoke to another teacher this week about summer school.  She said they'd read some amazing books, prescribed by the school board for summer school, but full of swearing that had been censored out of each book with thick black marker!  As if teen readers won't know what the blacked-out word is, won't hear it in their minds as their eyes float past it, and never, ever, encounter profanity in their daily lives.

Or maybe it is because I am now tucked away in Niagara-on-the-Lake for a three day workshop on Critical Literacy, which essentially boils down to thinking deeply about things before forming your own opinions.  Tonight, I share an example of why this is a super approach to life.

(Ahem).  WAAAYYY back in the beginning of June, the great Laurie Halse Anderson responded to a Wall Street Journal article that criticized Young Adult Fiction.  The title of the original article was:  * “Darkness Too Visible,” by Meghan Cox Gurdon. The subtitle is “Contemporary fiction for teens is rife with explicit abuse, violence and depravity. Why is this considered a good idea?”

I've read both the original article, and Laurie's response.  I encourage YOU to do the same.   If you haven't read yesterday's post yet, you might want to look at that one, too.  And then I encourage you to be "critically literate", think deeply, and form your own well-supported opinion.